Forever

There was a song that I heard on the radio the other day and it said something how if love isnt meant to be forever, then what is forever for? So I thought about it. You cant really do anything on this earth "forever" (aka until you die) except to love. True love will never fade even through the ups and down of life.

If you love for money...it will fade
If you love for beauty...it will fade
Love someone for who they are and always will be...love will never fade
<3

Eyes.

I went to the eye doctor today (I hate eye appointments). Some of you might not no me very well, but I have bad eye history. But I'll eplain that later, pretty much I just want to thank God right now that I have perfect vision in my right eye. There is a chance that I could lose all my vision in my left eye, so I have to protect my right eye with my life haha. 6 years ago, I use to be able to see 20x25 out of my left eye...it has decreased majorly. Today it was 20x100. Over 6 years of time it decreased that much! That is a little scary for me.

Story time:

This is the story behind my left eye. I was born with a cataract and had it removed when I was like a month old. From that point out, my mom put a contact in my left eye and patch on my right eye to try to strengthen my left eye as much as possible. When I got older, still keeping the patch wear trend, I wore glasses on top of that contact, still trying to strenghten my left eye. When I was 5 years old, they had to do an eyelid lift because not only was there a cataract on my lens, my eye wasnt fully developed so it was smaller than my right eye, causing my left lid to droop. So, I kept on wearing the contact, patch and glasses. (Can't remember when I stopped wearing the patch) With the naked eye (my left one) all I could see was if it was dark or light in a room. I remember walking in my living room and just seeing the windows, the light shining in, and that was it. When I was 11, just the contact and glasses at this time, my eye started to reject the contact. It hurt really bad anytime I would try to put it in. So Dr. Grin said that I needed to go ahead and have my lens implant that they were planning to do when I was 13. I had my surgery and everything seemed to be going ok. I went back for my yearly check up and Dr. Grin told my mom and I that it had fallen forward, but they were going to try to fix it without surgery. (Sound painful? Well it was) First they tried to dialate my eye and have my lay flat on my back for 3 hours...boring. That didnt work. So she sent me over to her husbands off who is an eye surgeon, and he numbed my eye up, told me to squeeze my moms hand and then he tried to TAP IT BACK IN with this lovely little metal hook. It hurt! And guess what, it didnt work either. So then I had my 2nd lens implant when I was 12. It was sucessful! They put in a bigger lens so that it wont fall forward again and I havent had trouble since. Except for losing vision in that eye. Im incredibly near-sighted. After the surgery, they were impressed because I was suppose to see like 20x200 but I saw 20x25. My vision has decreased over the years, but still blessed that I'm not blind!

Think.

"It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you've got"

Think about that...

reading minds*

If you could have one super power, what would it be?

*I chose reading minds because sometimes people either expect you to read their minds, or they don't tell you what they truly think of you. Both of these drive me crazy. For me, if I am annoying you, then I would rather be told that I am annoying you over me trying to figure out if you want me to talk to you or not. Or sometimes people will get mad that you cant read their mind, like, "you should have known that already!" Its a mind battle within itself.

I just want to give a quick shout out to Mr. Robertson. It gives me confidence to know that I'm not just sitting here having a conversation with myself. Thanks!

Food.

Ecclesiastes 6:7 –“ All mans efforts are for his mouth, yet his appetite is never satisfied.”

Love Jesus more than your stomach.

Prayers...

Serving others. God has created us to serve others. Do we? Sometimes maybe. All the time? No. Serving others, doesn't always just help the person you're serving, it helps you too. We need to help people in anyway we can. If we don't we are selfish and self-centered. It takes sacrifice and love. Some people say, “Well, I'm too busy.” Fine. Pray. Our prayer is the best thing we can do. We can help them even more by praying for them then trying to do it on our own. Yes, it takes time out of your day, but you can make a huge difference in other peoples life. Be a prayer warrior. Don't let others down OR let Him down. He put you here to make a difference. Don't be ordinary when you could be extraordinary. Pray.

Dreams?

Lately I have been thinking about my dreams and what it would take to achieve them. Then sometimes I actually start to see my dream come to life, but its ripped out from under my feet. I have dreams that I feel its something I'm suppose to do, or something that I've wanted to do all my life, then something stops it. Do you ever have giants in the way of your dreams? It happens to me all the time. Sometimes you have someone that discourages your dreams, telling you that it wont work, or that its not safe. You then start to doubt your own dream. It happens everytime. You leave your comfort zone and then not too long after that, you want to go running back to the warm fuzzy feeling. Why cant I just ignore the voices I hear and achieve my dreams? I'm still trying to figure out how to be strong enough or find other ways to achieve my dreams, but nothing's working.

Friends...

I miss my friends. It feels like I havent seen them in forever. All I do is work and sleep (of course eat) but I really have lost my social life. Going from school to summer is hard for me sometimes. I see my friends every single day, and then go to never getting to see them at all. I really need to get out more.

Ealry Morning Riser

My title is a joke, I'm actually the complete opposite. Right now its 3am and I'm up sick. So I can't really go back to sleep because I will just be getting right back up again. There isnt really anything to talk about, not that I can think of. I think my brain is still sleeping or something. But I guess I will just say, hope you have a GREAT weekend! Love ya!

Prayers of the Saints

Well lately I've been contemplating the importance of prayer. Looking back to when I was little, I use to think of prayer almost as a good luck charm. If you forgot to pray or maybe just left out something you prayed for everyday, something bad was going to happen. I don't know why I viewed it like this and maybe I was the only one that did. But have you thought about this, God is your friend. Can we start treating him like a friend and not like some huge man in the clouds with "lighting in his fist"? He loves you and wants to talk to you everyday, all day.

These past few weeks, God has made it clear to me the power of prayer. From my previous blog, I got a sweet job from talking to God about it. I really needed a car so I started looking for one later on in the week. I found a nice Toyota RAV4 that I wanted to get but it was on Craigslist so we have to email the guy and wait for a response to see if they had sold it already. I talked to God like crazy that night. I really loved that car, we got an email the next morning and they said they still had it. I went, saw it, and told them we would take it. I don't have it yet because we are still waiting for the title, but I thank God so much for blessing me with a car.

The power of prayer is nothing to be overlooked, but don't sound like a broken record to God either. He wants to talk to you like he was just sitting in a chair across from you. Show love...don't be a robot.

Jesus said, "Here's what I want you to do: Find a quite, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace. The world is full of so-called prayer warriors who are prayer--ignorant. They're full of formulas and programs and advice, peddling techniques for getting what you want from God. Don't fall for that nonsense. This is your Father you are dealing with, and he knows better than you what you need. with a God like this loving you, you can pray very simply." -Matthew 6:6-9 MSG

When God answers prayer...

I have had a stressful past few weeks trying to find a job, but today, it was an answer to my prayers. Past few weeks, I thought that I was going to be working at PacSun Warehouse. With working there last year, I wasn't too thrilled. But hey, its money. So I asked around to see if anyone knew of any jobs that were available, and I got one response. This person told me to go check his mom's daycare (I can talk about him because he never reads my blog) because she had an opening. So I was at track state and she emailed me the application, I filled it out, faxed it back, and had a phone call within 5 mins that set me up with an interview on Monday (today). The only thing I wasn't sure on was the hours that I would get, so I was really gave it alot of thought, and looked at my options. I told God how much I really wanted this job, how perfect it would be, but if only He could help me get more hours. Well I had an incredible interview. She first offered me the amount of hours I was first told and with it being a little ways from where I lived, I knew it wasn't going to work, so I told her that. She left the room and talked to someone, came back and said well I can give you this position (the amount of hours was TRIPLED!) I couldn't believe it! I just want to give this joy in my heart to God right now, Thank you God! And thanks to you for telling me...if YOU'RE reading this...you have an amazing mom.

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. - Ps. 37:4

How great is our God

This was a video that they showed at my church a few weeks ago. You might have seen it, but its pretty sweet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4zgJXPpI4

Summer Job?

Does anyone have any ideas for a summer job? I kinda need some help finding one. Let me know if you have any ideas!

Living Life in the Fast Lane

Well, yesterday was graduation. I wanted to give a shout out to my other class mates and friends that graduated in the proud Class of 2009! Congrats! But now what? What to do with my time? I have been thinking about the song by Matthew West "Motions" its one of my favs. But it talks about how you dont just want to live life going through the motions and then at the end ask yourself, "What if I had given everything?" I dont want to live my life like that. I want to live a life always serving God and others, never myself. I never want to feel satisfied where I am at, but I definitely want to get out of this annoying cycle of nothingness I find myself tumbling through. I want to reach out to those in need, and also to those that are greedy. It's not only the poor we need to reach out too, but also the rich. Mark 10:25 says, " It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Reach out to everyone. Don't just live life going through the motions.

"Motions"

This might hurt, it's not safe

But I know that I've gotta make a change

I don't care if I break,

At least I'll be feeling something

'Cause just okay is not enough

Help me fight through the nothingness of life

I don't wanna go through the motions

I don't wanna go one more day

without Your all consuming passion inside of me

I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,

"What if I had given everything,

instead of going through the motions?"

No regrets, not this time

I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind

Let Your love make me whole

I think I'm finally feeling something

'Cause just okay is not enough

Help me fight through the nothingness of this life

Done with school!

Well I am finally done with high school. I am really excited to see what God has instore for me. Something that God has made clear to me lately is your purpose. If you are still alive, you still have a purpose here. I love the feeling of knowing that God made you for one purpose, he didnt make a bunch of you's for the same purpose incase you messed it up. God made you and then he broke the mold. Just dont ever think that you have no purpose on this earth because you do. Rick Warren, who wrote The Purpose Driven Life says, "God designed EACH OF US so there would be no duplication in the world. No one had the exact same mix of factors that make you unique. That means no one else on earth will ever be able to play the role God planned for you....It is only in God that we discover our origin, our identity, our meaning, our purpose, our significance, and our destiny." Seek God and find what out His will for you, and do it whole heartly, because no one else will serve the purpose that He has for you here on earth.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Dream Big!

Hey everyone,
Welcome to my new blog. I thought I would start up a blog so that I could share some stuff that God has been laying on my heart lately. Dream big! I've been reading a book called The Dream Giver that my friend Elle gave me for graduation. (Thanks LA, I love it!) It talks about how everyone has a dream that God has given them but only certain people decide to pursue it. A few things that stop us are, what other people think, the "invisible wall of fear" that comes between it, and that comes along with leaving our comfort zone. When I went to Jamaica, there was a number of things that were way out of my comfort zone that I had not done before. To my surprise, it was fun, frustrating me that only fear was what was holding me back. We need to remind ourselves that God knows what he is doing. When we turn to go back in our comfort zone, don't ignore the voice that calls out, "Where are you going?" Listen and pray, have God guide you in your dreams.

"Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4